Red Season

I know I shouldn’t but …

citeh 0, FC Midtjylland 1

Here are the headlines and laugh reports from some of the papers. The Guardian:

Hughes desperate for heart and spark as City are booed off

The Times writes:

Mark Hughes wearing haunted look after nightmare

The Daily Telegraph opines:

Hughes Uefa Cup homecoming ruined

The Independent states, quite reasonably:

Olsen leaves Hughes facing humiliating exit

and BBC’s website reads

Man City slip to humiliating loss

Happy reading.

There’s as much chance of “Rule Britannia” (in any form) ringing around Old Trafford as United fans starting with “In-ger-lund, In-ger-lund, In-ger-lund” or (God forbid) “Swing Low Sweet Chariot”: no chance whatsoever.

At Old Trafford, the sentiment is captured succinctly in the Stretford End banner which reads:

United > England

(more…)

Just found this wonderful site which focuses on Manchester United’s Reserves & Academy News. It’s called United Youth and, trust me, it’s excellent.

Question: What do Liverpool and Chelsea, and the former football league clubs Thames AFC and New Brighton Tower, have in common?

Answer: They were each formed to make use of an otherwise vacant stadium.

Any chance of Liverpool and Chelsea going the same way as Thames AFC and New Brighton Tower?

Coincidentally, New Brighton Tower and Thames AFC were Merseyside and London clubs respectively, as are Liverpool and Chelsea.

Actually, there are 26 Uniteds within the top six levels of English football, but never mind, try singing the following words to “Rule Britannia”:

Man United

There’s only one United

Manchester United Football Club

As a postscript to the previous post, I’d like to highlight a portion of Sir Alex Ferguson’s interview after Ole Gunnar Solskjaer’s testimonial on Saturday.

Sir’s words were specifically targeted towards one L. Saha:

“We do not have any strikers apart from Wayne Rooney and Carlos Tevez and Frazier plays in that area. “He is quick and determined and he can do very well in the game. Fraizer’s future is here”

Sometimes when I wonder this, I question my sanity, but what if, by some miracle, Saha has a storming 2008/2009 season? The odds are against it, for sure, and that’s why.

Some of the best photos of the year appeared on the BBC website late last night. Here’s two for you, a goodbye to one past legend, and a warm welcome to one for the future. And I don’t mean O’Shea,

Solskjaer bids farewell

You are our Solskjaer. You made us happy. Thank you!

Frazier grabs the winner

We came from far and wide to a dark, secluded space, where spirits of dead horses guarded the skies and tattered betting slips swirled in the wind, to bond around a ball.

The Turf Club was once the Centre of the Universe during race days, attracting ranks of taxis that no amount of peak time surcharge could counter, and swallowing pay checks faster than Shebby Singh can say “That’s right, John”. With minds heavy on nostalgia, it was a fitting setting for what transpired last night, which saw another end of sorts: the burial of six young innocents in Light Tops.

The Paul Masefield-owned “Premier Pitch” is located down a poorly lit cul-de-sac in the re-fashioned “Turf City”. We were greeted by a wailing silence when we arrived; the only person in sight was the tee shirt clad manager/money collector/caged monkey/janitor/drinks guy. No-one had booked either of the pitches for the sessions before or after ours. You would have thought that one solution for poor demand for use of the facilities would be to lower prices from S$80 per hour. Just goes to show that Paul is as good an entrepreneur as he is a football pundit.

At least he has plenty of balls, though, with dozens of light, size 4s littering the fields. Clearly “Mase” has the fundamentals right. The field itself was well-laid and zippy, while the extra bounce of the football made control a priceless commodity; both factors contributed to an up tempo game and played no small part in the brutal, early exchanges, with Raj in particular getting one or two warm “welcome back” kicks. That, coupled with both his mind and body still absent on his Maldives honeymoon, meant Raj was unable to deliver a Raul-style “kissing of ring” goal celebration. At least he had an excuse; the rest of the Light Tops didn’t brandish a single MC between them.

Tom had the distinction of scoring the first goal of the inaugural game at The Pitch, shooting from distance into the bottom corner to put Reds ahead. “Distance” is relative, however, and The Pitch’s dimensions made for a tight 6-a-side game with time and space even more of a luxury than in the open spaces at Bukit Timah Campus. It was a tight game on the goals count, too, with the teams trading punches and alternatively taking and relinquishing the lead, sometimes deservedly, sometimes inadvertently: 1-0, 1-2, 3-2, 4-5, until eventually 8-8 became 10-10. The lightness and zip of the ball made for some spectacular goals, and required the best out of both teams’ goalies. The goals were evenly spread: Teik was top scorer for the Light Tops with 4 (although that’s not really saying much as Tom got 4 as well), while Ian got more than I could keep track of. Kin’s long range shooting was especially wayward and it was left to Darius to show ‘em how it’s done with 2 long range shots - one placed, the other smashed.

The difference between the teams, apart from the one-man disadvantage that Reds toiled under for the best part of the game, was movement. In attack, the quick passing and fluid movement of Darius, Marc and Ian made a mockery of the Light Tops’ defence; without the ball, the four Red outfield players covered every blade of artificial grass to close down and nullify Light Tops’ extra 6th man. Mark L. and Kin, on the left and right wings respectively, did not influence the game as much as usual, while Teik and Raj were oftentimes desperate to run into one another through the centre. For the Reds, Marc caressed 2-3 sublime passes which Ian unceremoniously thumped into the net with typical Gooner gusto.

The only real surprise was that the over-worked Reds did not collectively topple over by half past nine, when Raj trundled off to nurse a sore ankle. I may live to regret saying this, but Raj left a Great Big Space on the pitch and in the Light Tops team. Five against Five seemed fair numerically but in reality the fleet-footed and nimble Reds – powered by the demon Darius and Marc – danced all over the Light Tops to score 8 unanswered goals before warming down to finish 18-12 winners.

100-Plus rating (for exertion) (out of 5):

Hector rating (for Epic quality of game) (out of 5):

Tom’s post / bar count:

TEAMS:
Red tops: Tom, Ian, Darius, Marc, Sze Kuan, Nicolas (in spirit only)
Light tops: Shankar, Kin, Mark L, Raj, Yu Teik, Rajiv
Attendance: 11 plus 1.

The Straits Times, the bundle of paper that disguises itself as a “newspaper”, carried a short story about a United fan’s encounter with the one and only Anderson.

Seems to me we’ve just seen the first instance of the non-use of “Man U” in the local press.

Here it is, in case it’s been taken down:

WHILE his soccer hero sprayed passes across the pitch, young fan Nishok Kunalan broke into constant song.

‘Anderson-son-son,’ sang the Manchester United supporter, who kept up with the Anderson fan chant throughout Brazil’s training session.

His passionate display did not go unnoticed. At the end of the training, Brazilian midfielder Anderson, who plays for United, strode over to the stands and presented Nishok with a pair of boots. The 12-year-old even got to spend some time with his favourite player - hugging and chatting - before a flurry of media attention.

Overwhelmed by the gesture, Nishok broke into joyous tears.

‘I can’t believe it. It’s my dream come true,’ he said.

WONG CHUN HAN

Dear friends,
It’s that time of the year, again, when wives / partners have gotten a little too familiar and Saturdays need to be occupied in alternative ways.

That’s right: it’s time for Saturday Night Live (season 5), a.k.a. 5-NL.

Last season’s “SNLiv” was supremely exciting, with the title only decided by a goal in the last minute of the last game of the season.

What have we planned for this year? Well, for one thing, we’re hoping for more managers to sign up for our league! Visit http://auction.fantasyleague.com/ and familiarise yourself with the format and auction details. If you have any questions, we’ll be here to help.

We’re in this game for the fun of it - I think -  so the prize money is more of a secondary issue, only as a flavour enhancer if you like. However, we must also assume that you will be committed to the game for the duration of the season. Our entry fee is designed for this dual purpose.

With all that in mind, I will be collecting the usual entry fee of S$200 per team. This can be deposited directly to the Chairman’s bank account (i.e. mine!) or cash in a plain brown envelope. Ask for details. This fee does not include your individual registration at the site. Again, please visit the site for details of costs, etc. Upon payment of said amount (S$200), and your registration at the site, you will be sent an invitation to 5-NL.

Prizes will broadly follow the usual structure as follows:

1. Mega riches for the Manager finishing top of 5-NL;
2. A consolation prize and a sympathetic pat on the back for the runners-up;
3. Eight (or 9) Manager of the Month awards.

Details will be determined after we have confirmed Managers in the league.